Monday, February 5, 2007
2nd Feb is the best friday that i could ever thank God for!!
It was my younger's brother birthday on 2nd feb and it was also the LAST DAY OF MY LAST ATTACHMENT!!!
I am happy cuz i can dunk my uniform into the bonfire with my friends and celebrate the days of an intern be gone~ I have been endless attachments at various hospitals since my 2nd year in physiotherapy and it really amazes me how i survive the scrutinizing, the daily questionings of patient's conditions, the endless medication list i have to memorise and the ever kiasu attitude to make sure my patients dont faint, collapse, fall or die on me.
As I looked back and recalled the first attachment till my very last one, " GRACE" just fills my mind and soul. Though the days in the hospital were tough, nevertheless my day will always begin with a prayer in bed for our Lord's grace and mercy, everlasting favour and wisdom to be upon me. I heard of people struggling at the other hospitals or centres, scary supervisors that haunt them constantly for answers to their professional inquisitivity. I will never fail to go down on my knees and ask God for a good, friendly and mentoring supervisor.
To this day, I have not yet met nasty ones by the grace of God! I understood the amount of time and energy that i have to give in order to juggle school, attachments, club matters and not forgetting ministry. I had to hand to God my involvement in the canoeing team in school so as to give more time unto ministry.
As I served GOd with all i can and all i have, I found myself still struggling with studies. I asked God why with all this faithful serving, I do not get blessed in return. I failed a particular module 3 times for its practical component. I felt stuck. stuck in a wrong place, feeling that perhaps i had gone to the wrong place.
IN His timing He revealed 2 Tim 2:11-13, V13: If we are unfaithful, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself. I felt some kinda housefly, swanked by newpaper when i saw that verse. I have been seekin God with the wrong motive. I came before God and asked Him to forgive my ways and change my thinking. I had one thing in mind: MY GOD WILL NOT FAIL ME. I persevered through my attachments and when i arrived the to the one i failed 3 times, i prayed to God really hard to reveal His power and grace for that attachment phase. And i can proudly speak of my Father's love that is ever bountiful, ever forgiving, ever ready to give because in ALL of my attachments to date( INcluding the scary module that i failed) I passed my second year with a disctinction and have cleared ALL my 3rd year attachments. PRAISE GOD!!
The assurance God gave to me about my performance during attachment covered all the inadequacies and anxieties i had in my heart.. and like in the bible- He can never deny Himself, He is the same today , ytd and forever more. I remembered one supervisor telling me: YOu might become one of the good physiotherapists around. When i hear of these, you can just imagine the guilt and shame i had in doubting God but the peace and joy knowing that my Father in Heaven is in control.
It doesnt matter how many times u fail, what counts is your faith in our Lord to lead and guide you onto the rightful path.
Sis Vivian
10:51 PM
(SALVATION)
